When things are going well with chronic illness

I complain a lot about my health issues, and things adjacent to them. That's primarily because.. Well, they cause me a great deal of grief soaked with spit-spewing ire at my lot in life, and complaining is one of the few things I personlly have full control over.

Lately, though, things have been getting.. Better.

That doesn't mean I don't still have problems; I was sick early in the week. My nerve pain hasn't really gone down yet and I am just waiting for the next chance to bump up my Gabapentin again (I need to get it up to 600mg per day at least before I notice any real relief, if past experience is any indicator). The weather has also been pretty shitty, combining heat with elevated pain due to barometric pressure changes (think morning-after-hangover Taco Bell regret shits, but it's your whole body on fire rather than just your anus).

However.. The Orencia is working. I actually am able to frequently walk more without my cane (not long distances, and not on uneven surfaces, but it's still a fucking win). I also just maxed out my max out-of-pocket with insurance, which means the bulk of my healthcare needs for the year are completely covered (hello, X-ray for my fucked up shoulder).

This are all good things, relatively speaking.

A normie might think shit is still fucked up, and.. Yeah, it is, but when considered against my default state for the past decade+?

This is fucking wonderful. I am practically joyful at the way things are now.

My favorite classic analogy is a person dying of thirst in the desert; While you or I sitting in a comfortable room would probably balk at a glass of tap water (at least around here, where the tap water tastes nasty as fuck), the person in the desert is going to relish every last drop of that water.

I have been in that desert for a long-ass time, and I am enjoying this goddamned water.. So get me a fucking 'nother, please!

This post, like others that will follow it, is a continuation of my Gambling On Life series.